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My life these days... lol
spencer, morgan, reid, love, derek

So... how to sum up the last few weeks of my life... Last I posted my biggest problem was that my sisters had absolutely no taste in music. Understatement of the month (I'm not prone to exaggeration); my problems/difficulties/life have gotten a *tad* more complicated.

So in the middle of June my two sisters moved out. My two *younger* sisters. Way to make me feel like the 'still-lives-at-home-loser-guy.' I console myself with the fact that they moved into my stepsister's mom's house. I mean, that's not *really* moving out is it. It's just moving from one parent's house to another's.

The deal for them was that they had to enroll in school this fall, get jobs asap, and pay a whole $50/a month for rent/food. They've been there for over 3 weeks, they've signed up for classes, haven't paid *any* rent, and haven't turned in a single job application. On top of that, my youngest sister (17) has been driving around without a license regardless of the fact that if caught she won't be able to try for it until she's 21. Ugh. At least I don't pretend to be anything but the lazy sod that I am.

Another thing that's changed recently; my 'possibly-may-start-to-think-about-moving-to-the-east-coast-sometime-within-the-next-year' thing that I've had going on turned into 'Holy-shit-balls-we-just-got-evicted-how-will-I-come-up-with-$2000-to-make-a-cross-country-road-trip-in-the-next-two-weeks'.

So yeah, for those of you who don't speak ramblabble: I've known for a while now that my mother's divorcing my step-father. It's not that big of a deal, because... well I'm not sure but I don't think there's been any love there for a few years, and my step-dad's a bit of a lazy alcoholic type [hasn't had a job in going on three years now, hasn't made much effort to find one, and drinks alcohol like fish drink water (which come to think of it- DO fish drink water? I mean, I know they swim in it, live in it, eat in it, but do they actually drink it? Not the point I'm trying to make, just a side note really. He doesn't swim in the alcohol, he drinks it.) and has actually at one time blown off perfectly adequate job opportunities because he didn't want to stop smoking pot for the interview/drug test.] so really it's a good thing they're splitting.

My four year old nephew (who my mother had guardianship of for the last three-and-a-half years moved in with his mother about a week ago :(, leaving myself and my 10yr old brother at home.

So with the split we've all got to find places to go. My brother is going with my stepdad to my older-pseudo-adopted brother in Nebraska of all places.

I... have no real prospects. That also means I've got no ties, nothing to hold me back or anchor me in one place, but coupled with the whole no-money and no-skills thing it really turns out to be an overall negative.

I had offers from a friend of the family with an extra bedroom, an old school friend of mine offered up her couch for a week, but ...I guess getting out central CA would be good. I've always wanted out, just not sure I want New Jersey. :/

So yeah, New Jersey. My mom just can't do a cross country road trip on her own. I won't let her. And... I've got no better options... so... come August I'm moving to some little town right on the border of NJ and Pennsylvannia.

I've gotten off track and I don't remember what I originally intended to say... (gotta go back and read over what I've typed) OH! So the point is that because of my bum of a step-dad, my own lack of ambition, the fact that the rent hasn't been paid in three months, and my lack of ties to... anything I've got less than two weeks to sort and pack all of my belongings and sell most of my furniture so I can move to Pennsylvannia. I don't *know* anyone in Pennsylvannia. I mean, I've got an aunt and two cousins, but I *barely* know them. I *am* moving with my mom, but I don't plan on living with her beyond a couple of months because while I may be an unispired, good-for-nothing, mother lover I'm not gonna Norman Bates it up for very much longer. And my mother's family (who we'll be staying with temporarily) are so far removed from the kind of people I'm used to...

I mean for one they're all Republicans! And I call myself independent, but I do lean significantly left on most issues. My aunt and my female cousin aren't very confrontational, but my male cousin is pretty outspoken about his opinions and (I haven't seen them in over a decade so this is just what I've heard) not very polite or tactful about making those opinions known. Looking forward to those conversations? Nooop.

And as if that wasn't bad enough, as far as I know their musical tastes consist of country and the top 40 with occassional forays into Sinatra and some classic rock hits. Personally, there's *nothing* wrong with the occassional Sinatra binge, and classic rock is amazing... but country? I just don't get it. Never have. Never will. Won't even try. And I have to admit to liking *some* songs that hit the top 40, but the majority... nu-uh. My tastes tend to run both significantly heavier, and significantly weirder than that. I mean... you can't just ignore the British Invasion, Industrial Metal, Techno, rap rock, ska, reggae, boy bands, alt rock, indie rock, *70s punk*!

One of the hardest things is gonna be the... goody-goody thing the whole family's got going. I'm no juvenile delinquent, not at juvenile *at all* legally, but still not a delinquent... these people though, they're... 'churchy' for lack of a better term atm. I don't know if they're actually particularly devout, but they *are* religious (nothing wrong with it, just... different), respect for the law, societal boundaries, and they have some overall sense of propriety that I just don't recognise.

I'm sorry for rambling about this so much, but I'm really stressed out right now about everything that's going on. I'm living half out of boxes, trying to sell furniture, find homes for the pets, figure out whether or not I can take all of my books, divide the movie collection between five kids and two adults, reserve a truck, find a place to stay in the week between getting thrown out of here and getting the truck, find a place to keep my stuff in that week, plan a route from here to Omaha then on to Yardley, making sure all of my computer files are on *my* hard drive so I don't lose anything. I haven't even told my father I'm leaving yet (not that I expect he'll particularly care) it is something he has some vague pseudo-parental right to know I think.

On top of everything else I've been venting to you, my sleep schedule has been fucked lately. Usually (I say like I've ever had a real pattern) Lately, rather, I was sleeping fairly early in the evening and waking in the early morning hours. This way I got time to myself but was awake during the day to please my parents. Then, on July 4 I had to stay up for the fireworks show and since then I've been staying up too late, waking too late... sleeping like a normal person. The problem with that is I don't get tired fast enough; if I wake at 5am, I don't actually feel *sleep* tired until 1 or 2 the next morning. It's like my internal clock is in constant flux. Whatever, I just won't sleep today, fall out early and hope it works.

I'm fairly sure I've totally missed on several points I wanted to make, and probably forgot to bring several other things, but it's 6am and I haven't slept, and I'm under stress, and I don't feel like reading this back over, checking for errors, or generally using my brain.

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Well, maybe this will ease you a bit, Yardley isn't that far from Philly. :) which means you won't be completely stuck in the boonies, going to church and listening to Country. And NYC is less then 2 hours away.

The east coast isn't so bad, it stinks you're heading this way on such stressful terms. I'm currently living back at my moms, living out of a suitcase and a clothes basket- with 98% of my stuff in RI and the rest at my sister's house.

I hope everything works out.

Yeah, thanks. That's really my only consolation. As long as I'm on *a* coast I think I'll be alright. I'll be leaving most of my stuff in boxes for the next couple months.

I don't really think it's gonna be all that bad, I was just really stressed and tired when I posted, I'm better now. Relatively.

I've got my hard drive full of music and a box of movies/DVDs to keep me sane.

So, did you move recently? Is that why you're back with your mom, I mean?

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